Stories & Books

Monday, 10 December 2012

Hextuple Bill Mini Musings: Killer, Bunny Boilers, Germs, and Moon Nazis...

Hatchet II:
What's it about?
Adam Green's sequel to his low budget slasher & gore splasher about a deformed maniac with a hatchet wound in his face slicing & dicing in the swamps of New Orleans.
Who would I recognise in it?
Danielle Harris, Tony Todd, Kane Hodder, R.A. Mihailoff, John Carl Buechler.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
The first flick was, in many ways, almost unashamed in its pilfering of ideas from the Friday the 13th franchise. Fortunately this time it makes a modest move into its own territory (even if the foundations are based mostly on fanboy references to the 80s era of the horror genre). At a scant 82 minutes (with several minutes of credits), you'd assume that the pace would be swift, but the first half is mostly set-up for the back-half where a bunch of cannon fodder gets dispatched.

There's some inventive kills (pleasingly brought to life by practical means), and while half the script is underwhelming, the other half contains some enjoyable side characters and some cracking lines - there's promise amidst the mediocrity here, and at least it ends on a sly (and brutal) note, although one which is completely undercut by there being a third bite at the apple coming in 2013. That said, it appears that Caroline Williams, Derek Mears, and and Zach Galligan are in the cast, so the fanboys and fangirls out there will continue to be played to. Brutality wise, there's plenty of gore on offer, although I don't understand what all the fuss in America was about - it was released as an NC-17 and took a stand in doing so (for some daft reason, NC-17 is considered a filthy and disrespectful thing) and promptly did about sod-all at the box office. Here in the UK it was passed 18 uncut with no worries ... and still didn't do much business. There's some fun to be had here, but there's little else on offer than fanboy references to the genre's past, summing up a disappointing lack of ambition ... and the screaming nu-metal tosh on the credits is a total misjudgement. Alright.

Click "READ MORE" below for thoughts on bunny boilers, silent masterpieces, losers, coughs & sneezes, and moon Nazis...
Fatal Attraction:
What's it about?
Iconic 1980s thriller about a married man who has an affair with the wrong woman - a woman who's batshit nuts and doesn't take kindly to being cast aside.
Who would I recognise in it?
Michael Douglas, Glenn Close, Anne Archer, Fred Gwynne.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
I already knew of the whole "bunny boiler" aspect long before ever seeing it, but fortunately that was about all I knew of the movie. There's always going to be a problem with catching up to iconic and oft-referenced milestones such as these (I finally caught up with The Exorcist not-too-long-ago, but I'd seen all the 'best bits' numerous times from multiple sources). Well written, tightly directed, and with strong central performances, if you've still not seen it, it's well worth catching up with. Great.


Man With A Movie Camera:
What's it about?
Dziga Vertov's 1929 silent semi-documentary masterpiece that tells the stylised story of a day-in-the-life of a Russian city.
Who would I recognise in it?
Not applicable, but Mikhail Kaufman plays the cameraman.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
I saw this film very early into my film course and it was immediately striking. From the exceptional and experimental editing, to the artistry of the camerawork (where the cameraman is at times rendered as a God standing upon the world, casting his eye over the entire city), this is a true cinematic landmark. So many stylistic ideas and editing techniques that are considered 'new and modern' can be traced back to this point. Roaming from sleepy streets at dawn, to the industrial heart of the city awaking, to birth, marriage, divorce, and death, and finally the booze-fuelled night life, the experience is nothing short of hypnotic. Great.


Young Adult:
What's it about?
You know that popular girl from high school who seemed to have it all? Well now she's in her thirties, is a struggling ghost-writer, subsisting on diet coke for breakfast and one-night-stands to stave off the loneliness. Her life lacks direction, until she receives a mass-email which boasts the birth of the first child of her former high school flame - so she decides to return to her hometown and steal her ex-boyfriend away from his happy home life.
Who would I recognise in it?
Charlize Theron, Patton Oswalt, Patrick Wilson.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Coming from Jason Reitman (Thank You For Smoking, Juno, and Up In The Air), you should know that you'll be in for an interesting ride with an askew view that decidedly sidesteps the Hollywood norm. Re-teaming with his Juno scribe Diablo Cody, you would think it would be a hard sell to have the entire movie centre around a high school bitch-now-loser whose goal is to break up a happy marriage. It's strange territory to explore, definitely, and yet it works well enough to keep you following to see if an epiphany is due for this faded queen of high school. Expect the charmingly acerbic vibe that you've come to know from Jason Reitman's filmography, and a maturing penmanship from Cody, whose OTT stylings, which were enjoyed and endured in equal measure, are much calmer here. Good.


Contagion:
What's it about?
A pandemic breaks out across the globe threatening millions of lives in Steven Soderberg's stylish and terrifyingly real germ-horror-thriller.
Who would I recognise in it?
Matt Damon, Gweneth Paltrow, Laurence Fishburne, Kate Winslet, John Hawkes, Jude Law, Marion Cottilard, Elliot Gould, Bryan Cranston.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Kicking off on Day 2 of the outbreak, Paltrow's patient zero brings about a deadly disease that spreads across the globe as various government agencies (chiefly the CDC in this flick) struggle to track, contain, and cure the bug. Crammed full of scary facts about the spread of influenza, this is decidedly not the film to watch if you're a germophobe. In the UK we have a rhyme that goes "coughs and sneezes spread diseases", which is definitely true here, not to mention public surfaces, shared contact, and plenty of face-touching. What's more terrifying is how society begins to crumble in the face of this unknown superbug - pharmacies are raided, the homes of CDC workers are invaded, and via the Internet, self-appointed truth-seeker bloggers spread dangerous conspiracy and misinformation from the comfort of their own home. Sounds kind of bleak, doesn't it? Well it is, but it's also presented with Soderberg's typical flair and mercifully, despite all the grim sights and facts, there are some silver linings to be had. Far better than Soderberg's half-arsed Haywire, which was a flashy, but perfunctory, action flick Good.


Iron Sky:
What's it about?
In 1945 a contingency of Nazis fled defeat to hide on the dark side of the moon where they set-up shop and began plotting their return to earth for domination in the year 2018.
Who would I recognise in it?
Udo Kier.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
This Finnish indie sci-fi had a great central premise, initially existing as teaser trailers and posters to gain funding - and it has been a long wait to see the endearingly barmy idea come to fruition. So has the wait been worth it? Yes and no. For a relatively low budget film, the sheer scale on offer - as well as the design - is mightily impressive. Less-so is the endurance of such a wacked-out idea, even over just 90 minutes. Perhaps the problem lies first-and-foremost in the strange tone of the script, one which never settles. The Nazis are pantomime villains who are raised on lies and selective history (Chaplin's "The Great Dictator" is shown as a 10-minute short film that champions Hitler's ideas, rather than berates and humiliates them), while back on earth, the politics of America circa 2008 are writ-large across the out-dated script. The President is a none-too-subtle comic book version of Sarah Palin who is desperate for re-election. The politics of the script are punky and searing at times, while at others they're overly-simplistic and even naive - this will sound quite daft, but the notion that the filmmaker's native Finland would be the only country to not arm their space ship, simply sticks in the throat.

As such, your enjoyment of the film ranges from scene-to-scene, from wonderment at the sheer spectacle on a relatively low budget for such fare (vast complexes, space battles, etc), to groans and eye rolling at blunt and out-dated side-swipes at American politics, to pleasurable tickling of ribs at well-poised moments of satire. Furthermore, and finally, one of the film's strongest points, but also biggest weaknesses, are the serious moments. Amidst all this Nazis-on-the-moon buffoonery, you're knocked-for-six by some surprisingly bleak comments on global social politics ... as a viewer you're unsure throughout most of the movie of how to feel at any given moment. This isn't to say that comedy and serious comment can't co-exist, but here the tonal shifts are frustratingly hard-to-juggle.

I don't want to sound as if I'm coming down too hard on the flick - perhaps there's an element of hype or anticipation or expectation, perhaps in-time a second viewing will better address some of the movie's troubles - however, despite some problems, there's plenty on offer. While the political side swipes sometimes overstep the mark (or turn up to the party way-too-late), they can also be decidedly chuckle-inducing. The campness of the characters inspire pantomime-style reactions, and the production design and computer effects are extremely impressive. Flawed? Most certainly, but there's still plenty of plus points throughout. Good.

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