Okay, no disguise at all, but rather my thoughts on "Transformers", the Bay movie version.
Now, first off, I never watched "Transformers" as a kid, so all that stuff is completely lost on me - I was always about "The Real Ghostbusters" instead.
Over all I thought it was pretty good fun, lots of wham-bam-Bay-action, plenty of quippy smart-arse one liners, Megan Fox and finally Shia LaBouf (or however you spell it) pimping some solid acting. I certainly see the influence of Steven Spielberg, the whole "boy's first car" vibe really does help pull the first hour together and give it an extra layer, a bit more meaning than just a bunch of robots shit-kicking each other. It certainly kept me entertained for the rather hefty duration, even if I did pause it a few times to answer nature's text message or grab some more munchies.
Things I thought were daft though - while cool, the Mustang police car was stupid, no police car is a cool-arse Mustang, and nobody seemed to care. That stupid, nattery little robot thing that snuck onto Air Force One and Megan Fox's handbag was annoying and needlessly silly, all that garbled 'dialogue' to accentuate it's comic movements, it felt really out-of-place and step with the whole movie...although, it fit right in with one of the Autobots pissing on that Sector Seven guy ... Bumblebee was it? It is Sector Seven, right? I'd look it up, but I've got bloggers laziness, so Wikipedia-it-up yourselves, ha!
Oh, and Michael Bay's continued fetish for helicopters just left me laughing, the first ten minutes being so focussed on said flying transport that it put all previous Bay helicopter shots to shame ... well, maybe not those in The Island, that was just OTT.
As for the smart-arse dialogue, all the talk about "Sam's happy time" did, I'm possibly afraid to admit, left me chuckling heartily at the screen - like I said before, it's a good, fun movie - and the snappy one liners just added to that summer blockbuster appeal.
Also, as previously stated, I never watched the original cartoon, so I've no idea whether the robots' dialogue was true to the source or not (although no doubt the hip-hop-voiced Autobot is a new change) ... most likely not. I guess it's difficult moving a franchise to a new medium, especially a summer blockbuster from a much-loved kids show from the 1980s, which would have been aiming for a much more concentrated market - in other words, no need to show Megan Fox bending around under a car bonnet.
Regardless, as a slam-bang summer action blockbuster, "Transformers" certainly delivers...although no doubt the died-in-the-wool fans were left disappointed, which is hardly surprising, such modernisations are only going to be successful with either the switched-off or the franchise-n00bs.