V/H/S/Beyond (Various, 2024) Review

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“That's why everyone likes filming spooky things with VHS cameras.” A few years ago the terror-fuelled streaming service Shudder took over the portmanteau horror franchise V/H/S, one that has always produced mixed results, from soaring heights of inventive and gore-drenched scares to crushing lows of misplaced fumbling for direction. Now onto their fourth entry in the long-running series, does Shudder's alien-themed V/H/S/Beyond deliver the gruesome, gruelling goods?...

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Prometheus 3D (spoiler-free) review...

What's it about?
Ridley Scott directs this sort-of-prequel to his legendary 1979 sci-fi/horror masterpiece Alien, which sees a group of late-21st-century scientists working for the Weyland Corporation seeking the answer to the biggest question facing mankind - where did we come from? Following a series of star maps, the most recent found as a 35,000 year-old cave painting in Scotland, the crew of Prometheus (the white collars, compared to the blue collars of Alien) set down on LV-223 (not LV-426 as you might have originally expected from the teaserific trailers) and begin to discover who these giant human-like "engineers" were, and why they were stationed on this far flung planet. Naturally, things don't go all that smoothly for all involved...
Who would I recognise in it?
Noomi Rapace, Michael Fassbender, Charlize Theron, Idris Elba, Rafe Spall, Guy Pearce.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Having inspired an onslaught of fanboy theories and discussion, the teaser trailers managed to re-arrange numerous elements of the film, only seen in snippets, to appear differently to how they actually come-to-pass in the film itself. It kept the mystery alive, but it could also lead to a few scratched heads with some viewers exiting the cinema a bit disappointed, or wrong-footed, by what they were expecting.

Speaking of expectations, try to ignore them. The idea of the 'DNA of Alien' being present in the film is indeed here - we are in the same universe after all - but the references don't come as thick, or fast, as some reviews curiously suggested, and indeed the plot is far more interested in exploring fresh territory. Big questions - the biggest of all - are asked routinely, and are mixed with deep moral and ethical outlooks. As David (the ship's android, played brilliantly by Fassbender) says to star-gazing scientist Charlie Holloway (Marshall-Green), how far are you willing to go? Such are the intricate and morally ambiguous discussions, and disparate intentions, of the main pro/antagonists.

Click "READ MORE" below to learn more about Prometheus, one of the most anticipated films of 2012.

Predators...

Predator is a classic, nuff said. Predator 2 is actually pretty decent, and it had an awful lot to live up to, nuff said. Aliens VS Predator (both of them) were pish ... nuff said.

And so along comes Predators, and thankfully it's pretty good. It was never going to beat the original and best, but it's easily sat there alongside Predator 2. Indeed, Predators and Predator 2 each do things better and worse than each other, so in the end they sit equally in my mind.

Adrien Brody does a surprisingly good job - I wasn't entirely sure about him being cast in the flick, but he really rose to the challenge, especially in the final punch-up, and what's more his character was actually interesting and strong. His sense of survival instinct based in the harsh realities of various war zones made for a nice twist into the mix of characters, and made the 'hunter versus prey' aspect feel more real. The realities of an injured person slowing you down to the point where you'll probably get killed came to the fore.

The previous films were of course about a Predator going on a hunt, but this film really takes the "hunt" angle and runs flat-out with it. The game preserve planet idea works better than expected (even if it still looks like earth most of the time), and the whole escalation of the Predator lore made for interesting viewing. The Predators adapt after every 'season' with new tactics and weapons, and the idea that they even hunt their own is chillingly cool.

The film does many things right. The soundtrack strikes a nice balance between reference to the original (some tracks are directly lifted with great effect) and newly recorded tracks that manage to maintain a consistency with the existing score. The homages were for the most part handled well, and I never found them to be obtrusive - it was enjoyable to catch the odd nod or wink throughout, with even a couple of quite subtle references tossed into the mix for the real franchise fanboys. Plus the action, violence and gore made for a good thrill ride.

The film isn't without fault, of course. Topher Grace doesn't stand out as well as the other actors in the ensemble (much like how he didn't leave much of a dent on Spider-Man 3), but then again I've never been fussed about him as an actor anyway. Laurence Fishburne, however, often makes a big impression, and he made a decent impression here ... it's just a shame that his appearance was almost entirely pointless. He crops up for five minutes, talks like a nutter, and sods off. It was also a shame that Danny Trejo didn't get an awful lot of screen time, and that there was a noticeable dip towards the end of the second act, but even still it was a thoroughly enjoyable time.

At last - a good movie with Predators in it!

Monsters VS Aliens...

The main problem CGI family-friendly flicks (produced by those other than Pixar) have, is that they aren't from Pixar. The gang that gave us such greats as Toy Story, Monsters Inc, and WALL.E really know what they're doing, and frankly everyone else is trailing in their dust (although Cars was a noticeable mis-step, and Ratatouille wasn't much better).

However, Dreamworks (who have given us the hugely successful Shrek films - none of which I've seen - and the two Madagascar movies - both of which I've seen and rather enjoyed) continues to do a stand-up job of walking in Pixar's shadow, while producing solid fare.

Monsters VS Aliens is such a film. It might be a little light on the laughs at times, and the plot can sometimes drag a little here and there (before feeling a bit rushed and undercooked in the third act), but the quality of the characters carries you through - especially the Seth Rogen voiced B.O.B, who steals every scene he wobbles through. Add in Keifer Sutherland's gravel-voiced W.R. Monger, Reese Witherspoon's cute-and-huge Ginormica, Will Arnett's cocky, Creature From The Black Lagoon-riffing The Missing Link, Hugh Laurie's mad, cock-roach-headed Dr Cockroach and a wide-eyed Insectosaurus, and you've got a good, fun movie.

It doesn't contain the same level of heart or originality that engenders Pixar's greatness (I'm really looking forward to checking out Up), but it's a really fun flick packed with references for sci-fi and monster movie lovers.

Avatar (in 3D)...

Introduction:

Straight into my Top Ten of 2009, and most likely my favourite film of the year, comes Avatar - in freakin' 3D as well.

The triumphant return of James Cameron has happened, and in 3D to boot with the biggest budget ever attached to a feature film - territory that isn't unfamiliar to JC, as he was both the first to break the $100 and $200 million barriers. To kick off, I'm going to address some of the up-front issues that have been incessantly talked about by the mass media (the extent of which is unfair and needlessly focusses on only a select few eye-catching things).

3D:

Anyway, to get them out of the way, let's first start with the 3D technology utilised in Avatar. I hadn't seen a movie in this new fangled 3D tech before - those clear-lensed plastic framed glasses that make everyone look like Buddy Holly - and indeed I was saving myself specifically for Avatar. I had a brief moment of pondering going to see My Bloody Valentine 3D, but soon came to my senses (indeed the film itself was pish, and unsurprisingly the original movie is superior). I'm pleased to say my eyes didn't hurt, nor did I get a headache, and there was no blurring to the image - only at times a sort of juddery look to some of the faster moving elements in the foreground. There'll be more technical words to describe and illustrate whatever that issue was, but they're beyond me ... fortuntely the few times that happened didn't detract from the whole.

So there we six were in the cinema, four of whom (myself included) had never seen one of these 3D movies, all thoroughly weirded out by the first jolt of 3D trickery - some advert involving a giant head thing with nuts (or something) flying through jungle. At that point I'll admit I did instinctively duck out of the way with not a hint of irony or mockery. Indeed, such trickery was throughout Avatar - but in a far more subtle way.

For example, holographic computer screens peering in at the edge of the frame, on-screen text, glowing seeds floating on air currents, or burning embers drifting through the shot (convincing enough that I almost started trying to swat them away before realising). As such however, these moments did cause an amount of distraction (especially with this being my first foray into 3D cinema going), but never enough to spoil anything I'm pleased to say.

Mercifully James Cameron (naturally) avoided such ludicrous 3D spectacles as poking anything and everything including the kitchen sink into the camera lens, and anytime a spear or machine gun lunged at us it was in a shot that would have been composed as such regardless of the 3D.

Is the 3D required the tell the story? Far from it, and it never will be. So it's really only there to add to the immersion, but again this isn't truly necessary as I've so often found myself fully immersed in 2D movies on a television screen. Indeed, JC's Aliens continues to leave me utterly gripped throughout when watched in 2D on a 20 inch TV. It's the quality of the filmmaking that counts, not the flashy gadgets on offer.

That said, in the case of Avatar, the 3D did help to add an extra layer of immersion that made visiting JC's Pandora an extra special experience. Seeing this movie in 3D was a treat in itself, and might possibly be a one-off for me. Do I want to see Pixar movies in 3D for example? Not really. The quality of the storytelling and the animation is what matters in a Pixar movie. Avatar was however, an exception, and while it will most likely work just as well in 2D, I was utterly willing to go that extra mile just for James Cameron.

The budget:

The next common issue to be gang-humped by the mass media is the budget. Yes, it's large - officially $230 million (with a further $150 million for advertising) - but so what? JC has broken budget barriers before, and he still is. Move on already, sheesh. The budget doesn't make the movie (well technically it does, because it pays for everything, but you know what I mean) - just look at Transformers 2. It cost a packet and it was stupid ... a guilty pleasure sure, but really, really, really stupid.

The CGI:

Next up - the CGI - sitting there watching Avatar I had a thought. What's the big problem with CGI that some people have? It has it's place, just as long as it's utilised correctly, and indeed with this flick it's totally necessary. Without CGI you couldn't make Avatar. The only thing that practical effects (like a puppet) has over CGI is that you just know that it exists in the same physical space at the same time as the actors. Indeed this can sell the puppet better than some CGI (especially the earlier stuff) which can look utterly pish. However, even a puppet is fake. It's materials cobbled together (with skill) to make something that doesn't exist. Similarly, the CGI work of Weta (who did fantastic work on the Lord of the Rings trilogy) is a case of just using a computer to make things that don't exist.

At times some of the creatures do look 'too CGI' (for example the Hyena-and-Panther-like creatures during one night-time ambush, which look rubbery in a CGI way), and you're fully aware that it's all a lot of CGI going on ... however, for the most part you buy it. You indulge your imagination - just like you'd do with a rod puppet, or fake severed limb. The world of Pandora and its military & corporate occupiers are mostly constructed from CGI, so it all works in the end. It's how this film is supposed to look - this isn't a case of chucking a bit of CGI into a live action movie. Indeed, this is more a case of throwing a bit of live action into a CGI festival.

Is this a bad thing? Not in the slightest - like I said, this is just how Avatar is supposed to look, and thus it works.

Further to the issue of CGI is the Na'vi themselves. When I first heard about Avatar, I was a bit "eh?" about the whole 10ft tall blue aliens with tails thing. Fortunately the more I saw the more I become invested in the idea, and by the end of the movie (indeed within minutes of being introduced to the Na'vi in the cinema) I was a true believer in the Na'vi. They felt real, even in the (wisely few) scenes featuring humans and Na'vi.

What sold it? The human emotion of those performing the parts. Indeed, the motion capture utilised in Avatar is a runaway success. These blue aliens feel like real beings, and being able to see the people beneath it all further adds to selling you the idea. Sam Worthington, Sigourney Weaver and Joel Moore's avatars all look the spitting image of them, and while (for me at least) Zoe Saldana's Neytiri looks less like their human counterpart than the others (perhaps because I'm less familiar with her, and she doesn't have Moore's distinctive features or Weaver's individual smile), I'm still utterly drawn into the eyes of her.

Neytiri is a fully realised being, a charming and attractive character - you can see exactly why Worthington's Jake Sully is stunned by her and ends up falling in love with her. You're along for the ride through the eyes of Jake Sully, and you can never quite take your eyes off Neytiri as she guides you through the lush world of Pandora.

Twitches of the nose, minute movements in the mouth, the movement of the eyes - in all of the Na'vi you can feel that there is something much more going on that just some flashy CGI. You feel like they're real. Mission accomplished, Mr. Cameron.

The story:

Some of the more sarcastic and derisive members of the press and internet public have snidely commented about Avatar as being 'Pocahontas/Fern Gulley/Dances With Wolves in space', or even a rip-off of that Delgo movie (or whatever it was called - an arsey little comment which makes no sense whatsoever when Avatar had been dreamt up long before it existed and was indeed shot and half-rendered by the time that flop was released).

Personally, I've never seen any of those movies, so the comparisons are meaningless to me. Indeed, they should be meaningless to the masses too. Orson Welles himself stated, when being lauded as an original, that all the stories you could possibly do have already been covered. He said that he himself was making stories that had already been told. Indeed, it's all about the way you tell the chosen story, and what you do with all the minute details.

What Cameron does with the story is tell it his way, and while you'll know most of what's going to happen long before it does, so what? It's a joy to see it happen when it finally does. That said, the 161 minute running time is a bit much on the respective arses of the cinema going audience, but it's a damn sight shorter than Titanic (with a stronger plot to boot).

By now you'll know what the plot of the movie is, so I won't bang on about that. However, is it bluntly told? Having heard the review by Mark Kermode I was expecting something that would bludgeon me over the head. Fortunately I didn't watch that movie. There are moments of blunt-as-you-like exposition which are, of course, necessary for the audience, but they're written in such a way that doesn't make an awful lot of sense for people who know full well what they're talking about. People who have been living on Pandora for a very long time. The epitome of these moments of bluntness is a scene where Selfridge (Ribisi) moans at Augustine (Weaver) about why they're there - Unobtanium (a silly name, no matter how you slice it) sells for stupid amounts of money per kilo. Sure, we need this info, but do tell us in a better way. But like I said, the majority isn't like that at all, even if you can predict the general arc of the story.

However, how many films can you predict the plot arc of? Countless numbers, that's how many, so why people are bemoaning Cameron for it is beyond me. Like I said, a handful of story types told in innumerable ways. The fun is in how it's told and what you see along the way; to invest in the characters and watch their story unfold.

I mean think about it, how many people out there in the real world are living exactly the same lifestyle as many others? Exactly. Get off your soap box and just enjoy the world James Cameron has invested himself in and presented to you.

Problems:

There are some problems with the film though. The odd line is eye rollingly in-your-face, particular the one about "shock and awe" and ultimately the one about having to "fight terror with terror" (or something like that) - since when were the Na'vi performing terrorist acts on the mining corporation?

The action, unlike Aliens or T2 for example, never gripped me like those movies did. I enjoyed the hell out of it, but I was rarely moved to the point of finding my fingernails embedded in the arm rests. Meanwhile T2 still astounds me, and Aliens still leaves me wide-eyed, fist-pounding and breathless. That little extra something was missing from the muscly thrust of Avatar, and so the action set pieces didn't pummel as I'd thought they would. Even the final barrage, which Cameron talked about recently, didn't grab hold of me and shake me like a rag doll. Aliens (again) on the otherhand, did so during the four big set pieces.

The depiction of the Na'vi as 'typically Native American' is a bit on-the-nose, I'll admit. However, it never bothered me personally. Although it does feel a bit 'stereotypically tribal' ... but you could also say that the bastards in the mining corporation (such as Ribisi's Selfridge) are stereotypically git-like with their 'flea-infested tree dweller' dismissals of the Na'vi.

Indeed the corporate-versus-nature allegory is also a bit on the blunt side. However (again), that said, I never felt pummelled by it (unlike how I felt by the blanket coverage of the recent Copenhagen Climate Conference cop-out talking shop). Cameron does succeed in winning the audience's hearts & minds in favour of Pandora and the Na'vi. We learn about them and their culture as Jake does, and as such we are (perhaps unsurprisingly) on the Na'vi side when the final battle comes around ... indeed on the positive side, dare I say it, I was a little bit devestated when the Na'vi are left to flee their home (a feeling much-inspired by Saldana's honest, gutteral, heart-broken wails of sorrow - all beautifully rendered in pitch-perfect CGI motion capture).

Colonel Quaritch is a kick ass character, a chest-thumping gorilla of a man, but he's annoyingly one-dimensional. It would have been great if he was even the slightest bit questioning of his own methods, or just had a different side to all his gut-toting. Even still, you can't help but feel a bristle of neck hair when he brazenly fires upon an escaping aircraft.

It's interesting, but in a movie where the minute details of the CGI 'emotion capture' are so important, there is a distinct lack of the minute details woven throughout the script. The motivations and feelings of the main characters are often glanced at, but never excavated and picked apart. If there was some more of that it would have helped sell the human side of the coin better. Fortunately the Na'vi are covered quite thoroughly, albeit mainly through Neytiri. It's understandable though that Cameron might have become distracted by this rich other-culture and alien people, but it is still a shame that the human characters were left out in the cold a bit. To have been a bit less black & white would have been nothing but positive, although with the overall plot arc it's hard to see how that could have been achieved.

Conclusion:

Despite cursory problems, the odd quibble, and a slightly flabby feel, Avatar was a great experience. I loved visiting the world of Pandora, realised in such loving detail by JC and his team, and no sooner had I left the cinema than I wanted to return. I wanted to feel the subtle use of 3D again, I wanted to get to know Neytiri all over again, and I wanted to see Jake learn to love Pandora again.

Avatar is a different kind of film from JC. You can see a shift in his mindset and the influence of his documentary projects. Typically James Cameron throughout (central love story, pioneering technology, powerful female leads, record breaking budget, masterfully crafted and designed in-film technology, and so on), Avatar is the film to see in 3D. It's a welcome return of Cameron, and while it was never going to pull in the box office figures of Titanic, it is easily a better and more interesting film (my relationship with JC's Titanic has been a rollercoaster unto itself), and is without a doubt worth your time and money.

I'm very much looking forward to the DVD release, and hopefully it'll be a features-packed extravaganza. I want to delve into Pandora all over again, and I want to see how it was all put together.

I think that about covers it ... for now at least.

Ghosts of the Abyss...

Following on from the vast-in-every-respect, Oscar-gobbling movie Titanic, James Cameron's first undersea documentary was Ghosts of the Abyss. I'm quite late in coming to this particular party, so to speak, but even still it's a cracking film. I watched the extended version (90 minutes, rather than 60) on the double disc DVD (which has a couple of nifty extra features too), and it's utterly fascinating.

You get a taste of the exhibition itself, and what it was like to be along for the ride thanks to a window into this world via Bill Paxton. Better balanced as a documentary than the follow-up that was Aliens of the Deep, the use of superimposed 'ghosts', photographs and CGI models really allows for the untrained eye to really understand what they're looking at. Not only that, but it does give you a hint of the drama than ensued on that fateful night when Titanic sank to the bottom of the ocean.

There's just something about Titanic itself - the whole story surrounding it, especially the parts retold by those who were actually there. Perhaps it is a hint of morbid curiosity, but tragedy always carries with it a power to grasp the attention of mankind. Just look at 9/11 - indeed, it's stunning to see in the documentary that upon resurfacing once more the crews of the submersible MIRs are greeted with news of that atrocious event. Having just been exploring the wreck of the Titanic - a stunning disaster in 1912, which continues to resonate to this day - they are confronted with a new stunning disaster that has unfolded while they were deep beneath the crushing pressure of the ocean.

This really packs an additional punch to the entire documentary, and is something that is elaborated upon in one of the extra features on the DVD. It really does make you stop and think as a shiver runs down your spine.

Without seeking to spoil anything, there is a moment when the $500,000 "Elwood" (one of the two ROVs, the other named "Jake") loses all battery power and becomes trapped within Titanic. What follows are the rescue attempts, which are surprisingly tense.

So all in all, it's a wonderfully produced documentary with it's own voice in a crowd of Titanic testimonials and documentaries. A must-see for anyone who is a fan of James Cameron, or fascinated follower of the legend of Titanic.

And you know what, the 4-disc deluxe collector's edition of Titanic has gone straight onto my wish list so I can find out more about Titanic through the eyes of Cameron, and the technology used to bring it all to life. While the central Kate & Leo plot in the movie was a bit wonky, the attention to detail and reconstruction of so many events that really happened is just, for the lack of a better word, fascinating.

And yes, I'm on a right old James Cameron bender at the moment, all in anticipation of Avatar which is, at the time of writing, mere days away.

Aliens of the Deep...

What with the coming of Avatar - and indeed the return of James Cameron - I figured it was about time I got off my arse and checked out those couple of undersea documentaries he made early on this decade. First through the letter box was Aliens of the Deep, and what is definitely the weaker of the two documentaries.

That said, it's still fascinating. A mixture of technological and natural eye-saucering. It doesn't carry the same poised, descriptive and imaginative commentary as David Attenborough does in the exemplary Planet Earth and Life (both of which have featured undersea episodes, covering some of the very creatures gawped at in Aliens of the Deep).

Nothing particularly deep, but alluring to those of a James Cameron fandom persuasion, and those who want to get a taste of the experience of deep sea exploration.

Hush...

There have been a series of low budget British indie horror flicks coming out in recent years, some very much on the indie end (such as the grim Mum & Dad - made for £100,000) and others on the bigger end of the spectrum (such as Jake West's first big calling card - Doghouse - which followed on from his other, more indie projects such as the rather enjoyable Evil Aliens).

Somewhere in the middle and here we are with Hush - a road-horror-movie in the tradition of The Hitcher or Road Games, but taking place at night on and around the rain-soaked M1 motorway and its various service stations along the way.

While the opening ten minutes that introduce you to the lead characters and their faltering relationship can at times feel a bit clunky in the dialogue and delivery side of things, the atmosphere makes up for it. A near-empty motorway, a car meandering its way through the lashing rain, and a sinister-but-average-looking lorry up ahead.

Considering the indie budget, the atmosphere afforded through the crew's dedication (lots of consecutive night shoots, a lot of rain to be manufactured) really helps spur the film along - especially when the plot takes a more sinister turn when leading man Zakes catches a brief glimpse of a naked and caged girl in the back of the aforementioned lorry.

From this point on, and with the relationship establishing stuff gotten out of the way, the film really gets into its groove and becomes quite an effective low-fi cat & mouse chase flick. Pleasingly there are a few little twists dotted throughout that really keep you guessing, and on the back foot throughout most of the flick. All-too-easily this movie could have ended up as entirely predictable, but these few turns - as well as the previously adored atmosphere - manage to keep the plot fresh enough to keep you going through the not-too-short-not-too-long running time.

There are a couple of obvious moments, where you can see what's going to happen from a mile off, but it's still bloody good fun regardless.

I wasn't necessarily expecting great things from Hush, so I was pleasantly surprised to find more than I was hoping to. A very solid debut from Tonderai, and a really enjoyable British indie, which - on a final note - has further inspired me, as a fellow filmmaker looking for a way to get my boot wedged in the door.

Doghouse...

June's double-flick cine-trip's second movie kicked the ass of the last 'second in a day' movie we saw at the cinema (which was the utterly pish Observe & Report) - plus we'd had Pizza Hut between screenings, so my gut and blood sugar was thoroughly happy after an ice-cold Pepsi and a delicious individual-size (i.e. the literally perfect portion) Meat Feast pan-pizza ... it makes me want one right now just talking about, so I'd better shut up and start blog-juicing about Doghouse!

Was it ever going to be Shaun of the Dead? No it wasn't, and neither was Lesbian Vampire Killers, but that's not the point, and when you think about it for a moment, it's not even a fair target to aspire to. Shaun of the Dead was simply too good to be beaten.

Shaun of the Dead "ish" or "like" perhaps - as in, it's a "British horror comedy".

It'd be far more worthwhile to compare LVK and Doghouse - so which one wins out of the two (both released this year) - Doghouse wins. It's got a far more consistent style than LVK, it has more gore, it's funnier, and it's better constructed.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed Lesbian Vampire Killers, but it generally felt a bit inconsistent and rushed, and then it all kind of fell apart towards the end. Doghouse on the other hand sticks to its guns, and provides the viewer with a greater sense of consistency from start to finish. You're not rushed into things - you get the required set-up time - but you're not left checking your watch either.

I rather enjoyed Jake West's previous flick Evil Aliens, so I'm really glad to see he's getting to play with a bigger budget and bigger names. Doghouse (adapted from a cult comic) is a horror film for horror fans, it's for the 'nerds' in the crowd, the sort of person who relishes in the gloopy gore of The Evil Dead ... primarily at least. It plays well to those not versed in the world of Sam Raimi before Spider-Man or the 1990s, or 'pre-Rings' Peter Jackson, but it certainly helps if you're a lover of Sam Raimi's madcap horror stylings.

Doghouse has a better-than-average bucket of gore to chuck around (although a few more stand-out gore-gags like in Evil Aliens would have been welcomed by the Evil Dead lovers in the audience), Danny Dyer's 'geezer schtick' doesn't wear thin, and the general feel of utter daftness was a real pleasure to watch.

It doesn't dawdle - which was ideal for a second-screening on a double-dip trip to the cinema like we were doing at the time - and, put simply, it's a good fun slab of Grindhouse-ish exploitation horror comedy. Buckets of fun - so here's hoping that it gets a spiffing treatment on DVD for the genre fans to lap up.

The Game...

It's a rare thing to be able to watch a movie without knowing practically anything about it - but The Game is pretty much one of those movies for me - and for some reason, until just recently, it was the only David Fincher film I'd not seen ... ... well, out of those available on DVD anyway (providing I can find a good price for the special edition R1 release, I'll be hopping on the Benjamin Button wagon sometime soon - if only this useless gubment would hurry up and increase the import limit, because quite frankly, 18 quid - including shipping cost - is fucking stingy).

Anyway, where was I? Ah yes - I'd not seen it for some reason, and had been able to avoid any spoilers (and considering the plot, it's a film that could be easily ruined by spoilers), and knew barely anything about it.

I knew it was David Fincher's work (reason enough alone to see it), I knew it had Michael Douglas in the lead, and I knew it was about his rich guy protagonist getting involved in some kind of "game" that went tits up ... it's about the least you can know about a film before seeing it in this day-and-age really isn't it?

What did I make of it? Fucking great is what it is, a superb thriller with a spiffy final act full of twists, turns and everything inbetween. It's also interesting to see as it really does feel like "the film between Se7en and Fight Club" (the two 'if you liked' titles on the cover in fact). It's yet another film that marks out Fincher as an ex-music-video-director who really is of vast merit.

Alien3 isn't as bad as you remember it, although as a sequel to Aliens, it sucks - but Fincher's original vision, which is mostly provided on the double disc DVD's "assembly cut" is far superior in all respects to the theatrical version (well, it's not as polished of course, but other than that - simply better).

Se7en is an astonishingly good thriller - heck, it's practically a horror movie - intense visual style, a horrifying and gripping story, two enthralling lead performances, and a film which STILL freaks me out to this day ... and it's just so unrelentingly DARK - brilliant.

The Game - now that I've finally seen it, I can definitely say it rocks. I've not been this gripped by a movie in a long while alright ... in fact, one of the more recent times being gripped to such a degree by a film was with Fincher's Zodiac ... a fantastic slice of thriller action.

Fight Club - one of my absolute all-time favourites, and a film (and book ... and author) which has had a deep impact with me (and indeed many males in the 16-35 bracket). Again, the visuals are astonishing, the black so deep and harsh, the adapatation masterful, the pacing spot-on, the performances gripping ... etc etc etc. Much love indeed.

Panic Room - plot wise, it's probably Fincher's weakest film in his catalogue - but as far as home invasion/heist thrillers go - it's expertly and efficiently handled, but it's the technical aspects that (for me at least) really steal the show. The exhaustive 3-disc special edition DVD in itself is a masterwork of information - the technical wizardry involved in the making of the film is amazing, put simply.

Zodiac - back on top form - Fincher's intense attention to detail is abundantly clear throughout, the performances are awe-inspiring, the look and feel is stunning ... basically, it's another one of my top fifty of all time.

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button - the only Fincher film I've NOT seen ... ... YET ... it's not the sort of film I'd generally go to see in the cinema, as it's not exactly "lads night out" material, but it's a definite DVD purchase without a doubt. As soon as I heard about the plot, I was intrigued - and the more I heard about it, the more intrigued I got, and I certainly look forward to the DVD release (Se7en, Fight Club, Panic Room and Zodiac have all boasted fantastic DVD packages).

Anyway - The Game - thoroughly great. I can't surmise it any better, so why ramble any further - it's testament to the fact that David Fincher is a consistently superb filmmaker.

The Day The Earth Stood Still 2008...

Aye, a bit behind on this one - but it's not exactly like it's worth rushing to see. Far from it - just "worth a watch", especially as I've recently seen the original 50's version ... unsurprisingly, it's a case of the original movie "for the win".

The remake starts fairly promising, with a thankfully quite faithful update of Gort - but it all quickly goes downhill once Klaatu Reeves legs it with micro-biologist woman and her snotty-little-know-it-all-gets-in-the-way-snide-bastard step-son tagging along for the ride, which is basically staggering from one place to another evading the authorities.

There doesn't feel like there's any real purpose in their farting around, it all seems to be set up to stall for time so that Klaatu Reeves can learn that mankind is worth saving by using micro-biology woman and her shitty little step-son as unintentional ambassadors for human kind.

If I was Klaatu, I'd have bitch-slapped that snotty little kid for being a gigantic, arrogant pain in the arse - why is it, that kids in movies and TV, often end up being such know-it-all shits that just fuck everybody's day up? You'd have also thought that micro-biologist woman would have explained to her snotty little WoW-playing step-brat that his KIA father was a military engineer, not some arse-kicking GI Joe knock-off ... i.e. kid, you shouldn't demand that mankind destroy an alien visitor "just in case" - a complete 180 from the original movie, which had a kid with some intelligence and faith ... even if his relationship with Klaatu was damn-near paedo-like in this day-and-age of 'paedo's are everywhere!' fear.

Bung in a toothless role for Kathy 'bust an ankle or two' Bates, and a shoe-horned-in appearance by John Cleese as "the professor" - a character who is introduced so poorly you wonder if they lopped out five minutes of "why the fuck are you, Mr Matrix, erasing all my very complicated equations from my chalk board? ... oh you're an alien? ... and this is the answer to my questions? oh okay then" - none of that, and then step-brat goes and thoroughly fucks up everyone's day ... and you've got a rather luke warm hodge-podge soup.

Strange that it's only after Klaatu senselessly slaughters two helicopters, pilots-and-all, that step-shit realises "hey, this Klaatu guy isn't bad" ... indeed, what an utter little bastard.

Then Gort is chucked out the window in favour of that crap you saw in the trailer of trucks and baseball fields getting rinsed by grey clouds, and mankind gets handed the shittiest ending of all.

**SPOILER START**

We'll let you live and develop your way of life, but we're gonna royally screw up your technological advances, industry, incredibly important scientific research, and economy by somehow disabling all power - WHAT. THE. FUCK?!

Then the movie just cuts out ... seriously, what the crap was that turd-pile?!

**SPOILER END**

So aye - decent start, but then it all turns into a mush of nonsense and running around (script before plot, not plot before script, unfortunately), and it ends on a completely rubbish note ... without enough Gort, nor some of the most famous words in cinematic history - Klaatu, Birata, Niktoo - WHY REMAKE A GREAT FILM AND THEN NOT USE THOSE WORDS?!

See - visually flash, utter nonsense.

The Day The Earth Stood Still (1951)...

I've still not seen the remake - and nor did I want to until I'd seen the original film. Well, now I have seen the original, so I'm all open for seeing the remake now for a good old compare-and-contrast sesh.

I really enjoyed TDTESS, and the simple old-school pleasures of a classic flying saucer and the imposing figure of Gort, and indeed I could now fully enjoy the gag from Evil Dead 3 about "klaatu, berrata, ni-*cough-cough-cough*".

In fact, I watched TDTESS with my Dad, who had seen the movie when he was a young lad in the cinema upon a second run of the film, and we both revelled in the chuckles that hindsight provides.

Obviously it was a totally different world back then - these days "Carpenter" would be automatically labelled a paedophile at the very mention of taking the leading lady's young boy out for the day around the city - but clearly not so back then.

It really is a cinematic classic however, and the plot holes don't matter in the end (e.g. why only two measily guards outside the spaceship, why did nobody take a picture of 'The Man From Mars' with his helment off etc), because this film deeply speaks for the time in which it was made. The fresh threat of Communism and the recent discovery of atomic energy.

Indeed, the idea that "Carpenter" and Gort are merely policing the galaxy and suggest we'd be wise to quit our warring ways is interesting - for once the alien invader isn't the bad guy, and in this case it is planet earth who is seen as the bad guy.

It's also interesting that both sides look down on each other - we earthlings cock our brows at "Carpenter" as he surely has no idea how complex human society is, and he vice-versa treats us similarly in terms of earthlings being basic animals playing with primative tools.

The conclusion however - essentially, "don't be violent under the fear of galactic violence" - left food for thought, and having recently re-watched A Clockwork Orange, the theme and idea of "choice" came into play. For a race of space-men so advanced, they still resort to threats to cease a threat. There is no choice for mankind. We are threatened, in a somewhat bullying way, to be peaceful or we'll all be blown up.

You don't choose to live peacefully, you only decide to out of fear - mind you, the film doesn't go that far or gets into such a meaty issue.

It'll be interesting to see how the remake handles the original, and as I watched it I was thinking to myself how certain images or sequences could easily be translated into our world 50-odd years on. But importantly - which one will have the purest vision.

While TDTESS 1951 was no doubt populist in its general presentation, it was quite something for its different take on the alien invader story while everybody else thereafter would indulge in gleefully exploitative notions of giant ants, 50ft women and so on.

Will TDTESS 2008 feel cold and corporate? Will it feel too flashy, too smoothly made? Will it blow it all and churn out another lame-arse remake, which is usually the case of late when it comes to remakes of cinematic classics. When I see the 2008 version, I'll be sure to ponder these thoughts.

The first long-arse blog of 2008...

Well, we're firmly into 2008 now and I figured I'd knock up the first big post of the year with a kind of seasonal round up, although I mostly just indulged and watched DVDs, but still...

One thing is for certain, now armed with a new digital photo camera, I have been taking pictures of all sorts of things around the house. I'm particularly transfixed by close ups...I guess it's my background in art coming back through this device which has enabled it in a more quick & easy way. Plus it makes making graphics for my own short films easier.

But the holidays are for lazing about, and yes I certainly relished the opportunity. It was a DVD marathon alright, so I guess I'll give a quick run down of my viewings (or indeed re-viewings):

Superbad - even better than the first time I saw it now that I'm familiar enough with it to quote-as-it-goes, so-to-speak. Seth Rogen & Co are unquestionably comedic masters. Bring on Pineapple Express!

Alien, Aliens, Alien3 - I got all hot & bothered to get the Ultimate Edition DVDs for them, and I now appreciate them even more than I did, especially the first and third (Aliens is one of my absolute all-time faves). Alien is a masterpiece and Ridley Scott is a genius. Alien3 is a troubled gem with an air of greater things, thanks to David Fincher.

Long Way Down - not as good as Long Way Round, because LWR was just perfect, but still a bloody good adventure to admire and inspire. Bring on Long Way Up!

The A-Team: Season 4 - the majority of the episodes are actually rather good, though the celebrity guest episodes are just pandering, but the show over all has improved at this stage in it's life. Still awesome.

28 Weeks Later - I once scoffed at it, assuming it'd be a cheap and nasty money-spinner trash sequel, but it actually turned out to be equally as good as the original film. It even had a good story to match the visuals!

Spider-Man 3 - wordier than I remember it in the cinema, but still a great romp with a story to boot. Leaving it at three would be no crime, and Sam Raimi could do with returning to his roots for a laugh with his mate Bruce.

Halloween 2007 - having seen the work print, the unrated director's cut is much tighter. Not perfect and not as good as the original (obviously), but is a proper remake - not "name rape" like the new versions of "Dawn of the Dead" (Yawn04) or "Day of the Dead" (Day of the Remake -aka- Day of the Flying Bulgarian Vegetarian Zombies -aka- Careers of the Dead). Michael Myers is at last scary again!

Ricky Gervais: Fame - the least of his stand ups, still mostly funny but nowhere near the quality of the Extras Christmas Special, which was just superb.

I Am Legend - not complete trash, but the infected a bit gash and the final third is a bit cack-handed. At times though it's rather spiffy, and Will Smith actually gets to act instead of wink at the audience. The Omega Man was better though.

SAW IV - least of the series. A convoluted re-hash of the earlier films with a shite continuation of Jigsaw's work. The impact of the first film has long since worn off, and the suitably twisty script of SAW III has been snubbed. Surely it's all downhill for the two coming back-to-back sequels?

American Gangster - not Ridley Scott's best film by far, nor Denzel's. It's not shite, not by a long shot, but I've certainly seen the 'rise & fall of a criminal figure' story several times before, and at times done better I feel. To me it didn't have a strong enough Ridley vibe, to be honest.

This Is Spinal Tap - yes I've only just gotten around to it. Didn't laugh uncontrollably, but appreciated it nonetheless. I guess it just doesn't resonate with me personally as much as it does with others, but regardless I can appreciate it's quality.

Jackass 2.5 - it sucks that the Vito/Lambo tooth yank was excised. The deleted Wildboyz footage is hit & miss, but the rest is decent enough. Hopefully the DVD will plump it up a bit more and provide some more laughs, once it's in stock anyway, I'm still waiting for it.

...

So a well appreciated couple of weeks to lounge around and eat it was, although the wickedly harsh spot of indigestion I got a few nights after Xmas Day sucked big style...now though, the decorations have been cruelly yanked out of my life and stored away for the ass-end of 2008 ... this of course means that I've returned to writing.

For the past few days I've been busy refining the second act of my comedy script, which I'll just refer to as "GenPro" (a short nickname of the full, working title). Next up - planning out and then actually doing the third act...and of course, after that it'll be onto one of two horror scripts I've got percolating in the old noggin.

And there you have it, the first beast-sized blog of 2008!

Scripting round the bend...

Tried to create a funky title, but failed miserably...so on with the blog-juice.

Finished my "Round the Bend" memory-lane sesh, it has to be said that Doc Croc is officially awesome, nuff said.

Also fancied a re-watch of Jake West's excellent "Evil Aliens", after reading an interview with him in the Guerrilla Filmmaker's Handbook. I loved the film when I first saw it, still love it. It's superb British indie horror-comedy at it's finest, plenty of gore, plenty of flesh, plenty of gags, and plenty good ideas well executed.

Also recently re-watched the cast commentary on "Deadlands: The Rising", all inspired to do so after seeing some of the behind the scenes pics and video for "Trapped", Gary Ugarek's new indie zombie flick that's currently filming and is sure to be awesome. I certainly look forward to seeing it.

But what with being ousted from the TV room because of the Rugby, I sat down to do some script writing. Both 'banking' a one-page-script for a football-themed comic short (strange for me as I despise football), but it's based on (or really just a proper script write-up of) an idea I had for the Nokia Shorts 2005 competition - something which I ended up not getting around to filming. I'd entered the year before with an experimental short using footage shot during a location scout for "my NIGHTMARE" in the summer of 2004.

The main thing though, is that I knuckled down - again with a reluctant muse evading me - and bashed out the second draft of "Signing Off". I might do a small polish for a third draft, but I don't know - depends if there's anything I suddenly think of wanting to add to the monologue. I think I said before, but can't be arsed to look, but I'm writing it for Sean Connell, brother of Ben Connell who played 'BenZee' in "I Am Zombie Man 2", and appeared in the likes of "Smack Addict" and "Trapped" - speaking of "Trapped", Sean also appeared in that and officially became a legend when he took a throat-load of fake blood (food colouring & washing up liquid) after his brother over-zealously gushed a load of it in his face. Bravo to Sean for providing some quality gory-blood-dribble shots before literally washing his mouth out with soap - ergo - LEGEND.

More information on "Signing Off" will be posted as-and-when, same goes for "I Am Zombie Man 3", on which I've been trying out some rough ideas for the title sequence, rendering out raw shots to use later - get some of the leg work out of the way, you know.